We've only been in Dallas one week, and it's been a crazy one! I feel like I'm in a maze. I turn one corner, think I'm getting somewhere, then hit a dead end...go back a few steps, try another route, hit another dead end, etc.
Yesterday was supposed to be my second appointment with the doctor at the clinic. He was going to meet with me in the hallway since I can't go into the offices there. I'd been waiting about 30 minutes when I started smelling something in the hallway too! I ended up sitting in front of the elevator while my mom had the appointment with the doctor. It actually worked out pretty well I think. My mom took notes on everything he said for me. Basically he recommended a few things I could do, but said to try those and then come back to the clinic in a few months and see if I can tolerate being in the offices then. So even though we were discouraged that there's nothing else they can do for me at the clinic at this time, at least we had some other options to try. BUT then as we've been researching the things he recommended, they don't look like good things for me to do.
So then I spent some talking with other patients about different doctors and felt like I could try a couple of them, UNTIL we talked to a few other people and found out more about those doctors. I know all this sounds rather nebulous, it's hard to explain, but apparently several of the doctors people are recommending might be dangerous in a spiritual sense. At least two of them say they can see energy fields or auras around people. That right there scared me enough to say, No thanks! I really had no idea that this kind of thing had creeped into the medical field so much. It's sad too. People aren't getting help from normal doctors, so they're desperate and willing to try anything.
Anyway, I praise the Lord for protecting me so far from actually having an appointment with one of these doctors. It's hard to know what to do next though. I'm still waiting to see if Dr. Johnson can get me in earlier than the 13th. If not, I was hoping to have something else to try this week, but we'll just have to see what the Lord brings up. Even though I feel like I'm in this maze, getting nowhere, I know He is in control and has a purpose even in all the 'wrong turns.'
Yesterday when I was waiting for my mom at the clinic, another patient asked if I was ok. She was very interesting. She said she was a Christian, but she also talked about having a few drinks, and she smelled like cigarette smoke. She was really sweet though and starting encouraging me to have faith. I was very humbled that God would send me such an unlikely encourager. I felt like I should have been the one witnessing to and encouraging her, but there she was reaching out to me. It was just the expression of God's grace that I needed to get my attitude back on track. God is so kind and merciful to us weak creatures. As Psalm 103 says, "He knows that we are dust." Yet His love is higher than the heavens! Praise His name!
So after we left the clinic yesterday I was still feeling pretty toxic. We ended up going out to this park by the lake that we found the other day. It was so nice to breathe fresh air and just watch the water with the Dallas skyline in the background. There's nothing like God's beautiful creation to restore a right perspective on life. =)
I hope when Monday comes and we have to make more decisions about what to do, that I'll remember that the one who takes care of the birds (and the squirrels) is taking care of me too.
Thanks for your prayers!
Keep following Him through the maze. =)