Grief & Grace

“And now, dear brothers and sisters, we want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus returns, God will bring back with him the believers who have died.” –1 Thessalonians 4:13–14 (NLT)

 

“We grieve with hope, but we still grieve.” This is a sentence I’ve repeated several times this month as I’ve asked friends to pray for me.

 

A couple of weeks ago, a close friend of my family collapsed unexpectedly. A few days later, as I drove for hours on my way to attend his memorial service, so many thoughts were going through my head. 

 

It shouldn’t be this way. 

He was so young.

I miss his jokes. 

He’s enjoying heaven with Jesus. 

He didn’t have long enough here on earth. 

 

You know what it’s like . . . how your thoughts bounce around and your emotions swing from laughing at old memories to crying for the days to come without that person. 

 

Grief is a strange thing. To me, it feels like leftover night, when your mom used to put whatever was left in the fridge all week on the table. You’ve got some rice, chicken, some meatloaf, a few biscuits, a little lasagna, and maybe some potato soup. It doesn’t all fit together, but the fridge needs to be cleaned out, so there it is.

 

It’s not easy to navigate the volume and variety of thoughts and emotions that bombard us when we’re grieving. As I drove, I used the time to process and to pray about this unexpected grief journey. I’ve learned that in moments of pain, the enemy tries to sneak his lies in. So I asked God to speak truth to my heart and help me hear it over the rest of the clamor.

 

Our Savior is so gracious. All the time. Even in suffering, even in grief. He answered my prayer by reminding me of some important truths.

 

1) People are what matter most to God. 

It’s so easy in this life to get caught up in accomplishments or pursuing goals. But as soon as I got the news, I dropped everything and traveled across several states to be there with his family. Because people matter most.

 

2) Even little things make a difference.

The testimonies of the many ways my friend touched people’s lives were so beautiful. He might have been surprised up in heaven by how many people were impacted by his servant heart and kind actions—things he did just because that’s who he was, not for any recognition.

 

3) Jesus is our source of joy, even in grief—and I want to help as many people as possible to know Him.

This life is hard. We can all testify to that. But knowing Jesus gives us a joy that goes beyond circumstances. He understands every aspect of this crazy life on earth. With Him, we are fully known, fully loved, supernaturally empowered, tenderly cared for, and never alone. I want others to have the joy of knowing Him as well!

 

While I’m still grieving, I’m thankful for these important reminders that have refueled my passion for valuing and serving people, for delighting in Jesus each day, and for doing my small part to help others come to know Him.

This is one way God has given me grace in the grief. There are many others. And I know His grace will continue to pour over me—and you—in every situation we face. 

 

“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever . . . It is good for our hearts to be strengthened by grace.” –Hebrews 13:8–9 (NIV)

 

 

If you’re also grieving, I’d be glad to pray for you so you don’t feel alone on this journey. You can send me a quick note or leave a comment on this post. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted.